BY CHRISTOPHER STAMM
GUEST MOVIE REVIEWER
Nope (Now showing in theatres)
This film is rated PG-13 – for language and violence
Well, everyone, I have to say I was pretty interested in this week’s title: Nope. There has been a lot of buzz around this one, and the previews actually made it seem interesting. Commercials made the claim that it was the number one reviewed film in America, so yes, the hype has been significant.
Nope = Nope.
I always refrain from spoilers, so if you are eager to sacrifice your hard-earned cash and two hours of your life, stop reading now and flip to the obituaries, because I am about to break my own rule on this one.
SPOILERS AHEAD
Ok, you have come this far, so you know I am about to spoil the film for you. . .. . Here goes:
To sum up Nope as simply as possible, I would describe the plot as this: “Killer jellyfish from planet X.”
Yep, it’s that dumb. But wait, just when you thought it sounded dumb, get ready for this: If you do not look at the killer jellyfish as it flies over you, well, you’re safe; it will not eat you. Oh, yeah, it also gets indigestion from eating flags. No, I am not kidding.
Also, there is a subplot about a 1996 sitcom about a chimp named Gordy that one day flipped out and killed and then ate some of his sitcom cast mates. . . . Again, not kidding.
Take my advice: Ignore the hype. This movie is simply terrible.
One star out of five on this one, folks, and it only gets that one star because I was laughing pretty hard, even if the movie makers did not mean to make me laugh. The best thing about this movie was the popcorn.