TINA L. SCOTT
EDITOR
Serious national suicide statistics
In 2011, the United States had, on average, 12.3 suicides per 100,000 people, and while the rate has varied somewhat in each of the subsequent years, it has never dropped below that rate and in 2020 averaged 13.5 suicides per 100,000 people.
Comparatively, in 2011, the United States had, on average, 5.3 homicides per 100,000 people, and while that rate has also fluctuated, jumping to a high of 7.8 homicides per 100,000 people in 2020, Americans are now more than 1.73 times likely to take their own life than to die by homicide.
Nationally in 2014, suicide was the second leading cause of death among 13- to 19-year olds, second only to moving vehicle traffic accidents, and suicide in men age 85+ is the highest of any group in the country. Middle-aged men (ages 35–64) represent 19 percent of the United States population but account for 40 percent of suicide deaths.
From 2011-2020, 440,958 people died by suicide. That is an average of 44,095 people per year over a 10-year period, and suicide was the 10th leading cause of death in that timeframe.
A single year in Wisconsin
In 2020 in Wisconsin, 866 people died by suicide. They were our friends, family, and community members. One of them was my nephew, who died at age 28 in March 2020.
Of those 866 people in Wisconsin who took their own lives in 2020:
• 11 were 10-14 years old–children and early teenagers
• 122 were 15-24 years old–older teens and young adults
• 138 were 25-34 years old–young adults
• 148 were 35-44 years old
• 142 were 45-54 years old
• 141 were 55-64 years old
Shared circumstances
Regardless of age, the problems among people who commit suicide are often similar: peer pressure, academic pressure to get great grades, workplace issues and stress, struggles with body image and fitting in, relationship problems, substance abuse, physical or sexual abuse, poverty, social isolation, physical disability, illness and pain, legal or financial issues, trauma, feeling like a failure, and/or depression and mental illness.
But no matter what the age, suicide is NOT the answer. Help is available, no matter the circumstances. Suicide is a permanent end to temporary problems. Reach out and get help. Don’t let suicide be the end of the story.
Coping
If you are experiencing circumstances like those described above, there are things YOU can DO. Don’t give up. Instead:
• Get away from social media. It’s fake-people putting on an image of what they want others to think of them and snapshots of their best moments (if they’re being real in those), not the total picture of their reality. No one can compete with that. And no one should compare themselves to that.
• Lower your expectations of yourself. No one is perfect. What you see when you look at others, however perfect they or their lives may appear, isn’t real. Those “picture perfect” people aren’t really perfect and they don’t have it all. And it’s OK if you aren’t perfect either. You are human. Give yourself a break, and some grace for your human imperfections.
• Get away from unhealthy relationships. From fake friends to bullying to abusive partners to a toxic work environment, remove yourself from those situations. Report abuse. Get help if needed. Contact resources and authorities in your community, workplace, or school.
• Surround yourself with support. Family, friends, counselors, clergy, other professionals, a support group, and/or people you trust are necessary for human survival. No one can get through all of the challenges and struggles of life on their own.
• Practice self-care: spend time doing activities you enjoy, take time away from high-pressure situations, get adequate rest, eat healthy foods and get some exercise, spend time outdoors, learn and develop problem solving and coping skills such as meditation and breathing exercises, pray, see a therapist, and/or do whatever you need to, to take care of you.
• Ask for help. Regardless of the issue, there is someone or some resource available to help with the challenge you face. Whether that help comes from a tutor, financial counselor, a lawyer, a doctor, a women’s shelter, clergy, AA, or some other source, often help with your challenges is just a phone call or an inquiry away.
• Get help if you are experiencing depression or mental health issues. There is no shame in taking prescribed medication if it helps you. Talk to your doctor or counselor.
• If you feel like harming yourself, call 988 for help now. Don’t wait!
Warning signs
Warning signs that someone may be in immediate danger of taking their own life include:
• Talking about wanting to die or to kill oneself
• Looking for a way to kill oneself, such as searching online or obtaining a gun
• Talking about feeling hopeless or having no reason to live
Warning signs that someone may be at serious risk for suicide, especially if these behaviors are new, with increased frequency, or seem to be related to a painful event, loss, or change include:
• Talking about feeling trapped or in unbearable pain
• Talking about being a burden to others
• Increasing the use of alcohol or drugs
• Acting anxious or agitated; behaving recklessly
• Sleeping too little or too much
• Withdrawing or feeling isolated
• Showing rage or talking about seeking revenge
• Displaying extreme mood swings
Real life tragedy
This past weekend, Neena Pacholke, morning news anchor at WAOW-TV in Wausau and former college basketball player at the University of South Florida, took her own life. She was just 27 years old. Pretty, popular, and successful, this tragic loss of life is another that reminds the community that no one has the perfect life, no one is happy all of the time, and everyone needs someone to help them through tough times. We can’t do life alone.
But Pacholke’s life is just one of many that mattered … and somehow slipped through the cracks. Now her family and friends are left to grieve, mourn, and ask questions.
Every life matters. Don’t let your life, or the life of a friend or family member, slip through the cracks.
Talk to the people in your life. Ask questions. Get below the surface. Don’t just ask “how are you?” and keep walking. Stop, look, listen, and connect. Ask, “how are you, REALLY? Let’s talk. Let’s catch up on what’s going on in your life. How can I help you?” Sometimes all it takes is another human being listening so someone truly feels heard and accepted and loved to turn a life around … and turn that life away from tragedy.
Professionals say
“Talking about mental health and suicide has progressed over the years,” said Debbie Merkel, a Social Worker at Taylor County Human Services with 22-years of experience in mental health. “It still has a long way to go. Stigma and shame often get in the way of asking for help.”
“We need to normalize struggles instead of putting on that ‘face’ for social media,” she said. “It’s important that we–and others–don’t feel alone.”
“Suicide is preventable, and everyone has a role to play to save lives and create healthy and strong individuals, families, and communities,” Merkel said. “Don’t be afraid to ask the question, ‘Are you having thoughts of suicide?’ You could actually be saving a life.”
If you are in crisis
If you are in crisis, call or text the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988. The 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline is a national network of local crisis centers that provides free and confidential emotional support to people in suicidal crisis or emotional distress 24 hours a day, 7 days a week in the United States. Support is also available via live chat from their website: https://988lifeline.org/.
Sources: Suicide Prevention Resource Center, Center for Disease Control (CDC), and National Center for Injury Prevention and Control, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.