BY CHRISTOPHER STAMM
GUEST MOVIE REVIEWER

Fall (Now showing in theatres)
This film is rated PG-13 – for language, adult themes, and peril

Ok, I want to start off with the fact that at no point in my life have I ever understood why some people enjoy climbing mountains or high structures. Life is good enough for me with my feet on the ground, thank you very much.
When asked why they climb these things, I hear the same response: “Cause it’s there.” Ok, sure, if you say so, but remember, Mount Everest is littered with the frozen corpses of highly motivated people.
Fall opens up with three friends climbing some big old mountain free form, and of course, one falls and dies. His wife becomes despondent. (“Oh How could this happen, oh woe is me!”) It happened because he was a thousand feet up on a sheer rock wall–that’s how, you dummy!
Fast forward a year when friend number three shows up with the great idea to climb a two-thousand-foot television tower in the remote New Mexico desert. Sure, it’s 70 years old. Sure, it’s rusted and dilapidated. Sure, they are going to tear it down. Sure, there are signs warning of DEATH posted all around it. Sounds like a super fun idea!!
Of course, things go wonky, and our intrepid climbers find themselves trapped on top of the tower and, of course, nobody thought that maybe telling someone where they were going was a good idea. Come on now, don’t be silly!
And from there hijinks ensue, love triangles come to light, vultures attack (yes, that happens) meth cooking rednecks have their moment, and I will not discuss the drone–nope, not gonna do it.
Fall should have been titled “This is why it’s a bad idea when cousins marry,” because our intrepid heroes are just that dumb.
Fall gets two out of five stars, because there are a couple of moments that make you tense up, and the visuals are pretty solid, but on the whole, this one is pretty dumb.